Bedroom
by Rainwind
Summary: another overheard conversation by unwilling friends…second of the ‘Misunderstandings’ trilogy.


Bedroom

Summary: another overheard conversation by unwilling friends…second of the 'Misunderstandings' trilogy.

Disclaimer: I'm getting used to these…OH NO! yeah. Not mine.

Notes: just a sequel to grating, which friends loved.

Bedroom

…

They were sprawled all over the living room, wearing their respective pajamas and robes. Ron and Hermione were reading a book on planning the perfect wedding (Ron looking slightly put out), Ginny stretched out on the couch reading the paper and Pansy sitting on the floor leaning her head on Ginny's stomach, reading a thin book, the title written in some strange language. Blaise was having a fierce staring contest with a goldfish in a bowl, crowing quietly to himself when the goldfish turned away. Gregory and Vincent were playing a quiet game of chess in the far corner.

"I'm bored," Pansy said, sitting up suddenly.

Ginny put down the paper and grinned. "I'm still curious about Harry and Draco. I know Draco knew that we were listening but neither of them showed that anything was wrong. They just seemed pleased that we liked their meal."

Blaise nodded, not breaking eye contact with the fish, which had resumed staring with new enthusiasm. "Yeah, I'm kind of curious too. It seems like they're in a relationship, I mean they're always together and laughing and talking in low voices, and they're always leaning really close and then moving away and they're always doing things together…but they don't seem any different. I know if I was having fabulous sex I'd be grinning all over the place."

Ron raised his eyebrows, having lost interest in the book long ago. "How d'you know it's fabulous sex?"

Blaise just managed to stop himself from rolling his eyes. "Come on. Draco's had practically everyone in Hogwarts. Everyone knows he's gorgeous, and gorgeous people give and have fabulous sex, whether their partner is good or not."

"That's a pretty big stereotype, Blaise," Vince said, moving his knight and taking one of Greg's rooks.

"But it's mostly true."

There was a silence.

"Blaise," Hermione said suddenly, putting down the book, "you know that fish don't have eyelids, right?"

"Really?' Blaise said, still not breaking eye contact, "That's ni – hey! CHEATER! INCENDIO!"

"YOU JUST KILLED MR. GOLDIE!" Ginny yelled, standing up and practically beheading Pansy when she flashed out her wand. And truly, Blaise had killed Mr. Goldie. There was a small pile of ashes scattered at the bottom of the fishbowl, and a liquid smoky substance wafted up from them.

Blaise wrinkled his nose. "Mr. Goldie?"

"THE FISH!"

"Okay, okay…" he said, backing away nervously from a homicidal-looking Ginny, who was slowly advancing, holding her wand out like a knife, "no need to get…upset. It was an accident, reflex, you know…I'll get a new one…we can call him Mr. Goldie the second…"

"YOU KILLED HIM!"

"Heh, heh…tell you what…" Blaise said, still backing away but looking behind himself and changing directions a little bit, "how about we go spy on Draco and Harry again?" Without waiting for an answer he bolted up the stairs.

Ginny rolled her eyes, ran to grab Pansy by the arm and yanked her up the stairs. Vince and Greg followed, looking interested and Hermione pulled an unwilling Ron up the stairs after them.

Somehow they managed to press their ears against the door and listen silently, even while Ginny and Blaise had a silent cat fight, Hermione held Ron from running away, Pansy slapped Blaise and Greg and Vince, already used to Blaise, continued their chess game, comfortably wrapped in a listening spell.

And of course, they just happened to listen in at exactly the wrong moment.

"Draco…?"

"Yes?"

"I think it's stuck."

"Seriously? It shouldn't be that hard to get out."

"it's not coming out."

"Look…tilt it like this…and holding it at that angle just try and get it out."

"Okay…"

"I DIDN'T MEAN SUCK ON IT!"

They heard Harry sigh. "It's so hard to suck and swallow at the same time."

"I'm sure you'll get it out sometime. Try and use your tongue. It's pretty long, it should come out eventually."

He sighed again. "Yeah."

Ron finally broke free and ran once again to the bathroom, greener than he had been the previous night. Rolling their eyes, Gryffindors and Slytherins alike followed and resumed their boring placement in the living room.

Back in Harry's bedroom they were still sitting, blissfully unaware of the predicament of their friends.

"Draco…"

"Yes?"

"I think it's stuck."

Draco looked over, raising an eyebrow. "Seriously? It shouldn't be that hard to get out."

"It's not coming out."

Draco sighed and grabbed the water bottle from Harry, tilting it to the side so that water carried the straw stuck inside the bottle closer to the top. "Look…tilt it like this…and holding it at that angle just try and get it out."

"Okay…" Harry took the bottle back, stuck his mouth over the hole and started to drink, trying to get the straw out at the same time.

"I DIDN'T MEAN SUCK ON IT!"

Harry sighed. "It's so hard to suck and swallow at the same time." Draco barely managed to stop himself from laughing, knowing it would hurt Harry's feelings.

"I'm sure you'll get it out sometime. Try and use your tongue. It's pretty long, it should come out eventually."

Harry sighed again. "Yeah."

They turned back to their respective books and there was a moment of silence.

"You know," Draco said suddenly, breaking the silence, "Our friends think we're shagging."

Harry sat up straight. "WHAT?"

"Well, yes, it's why they've been asking us all these weird questions. If you hadn't noticed, most of our conversations are unintentionally sexually related if you don't know what we're talking about. They keep listening in at exactly the wrong moments."

"What are you talking about?"

Draco sighed. "You're so naïve…look." He took out a piece of parchment and scribbled down as much as he could remember from their conversation the previous day and the one they'd just had. Handing it to Harry, he crossed his arms and waited for the explosion.

"WHAT THE HELL IS THIS? WE DIDN'T SAY ANY OF…wait. We did say this!"

"That's right, Harry, we did. And they heard."

"Oh. So…CRAP!"

"What now?"

"I dropped the straw!"

"You got it out?"

"Yeah, I had it in my mouth and I pulled it out and then it fell!" Harry stood up and frantically ruffled through the sheets of his bed, picking up his pillow and random clothes scattered everywhere. Finally he bent and, shoving clothes out of the way, peered under his bed. "AHA!" he exclaimed triumphantly, then turned to Draco with a pleading look.

Draco sighed, stood up and walked over, kneeling down to help him lift the bed out of the way.

Behind the door their friends – this time minus Ron, who was lying on the couch with a wet cloth on his forehead – had just come back and were listening intently.

"Just a little higher, Draco…just a little more, a little more…there! Perfect!"

Draco grunted. "Harry…I don't think I hold this any more…"

"Just a little longer, Draco, I'm almost there…got it!"

"Finally…" there was a thud and a moan of pleasure. "Oh, that feels SO good…"

"Draco?"

"Yeah?"

"You okay?"

"Fine."

"Help me?"

A sigh. "Fine."

A pause, then several loud thumps of something hitting the wall hard.

"It's not going back in!"

"You have to have it at a very specific angle. It fits perfectly if you get it in right."

"Uh huh," more thumps and finally a loud groan. "Almost in…almost in…"

"There."

"Yeeeaaaahhhhhh…ohhh, that feels good…"

They backed away from the door once again, Blaise mouthing, "I knew it! I knew it!" And Ginny mouthing, "I told you so," and Vince and Greg looking at each other knowingly and Pansy smirking and Hermione smiling, happy for her friend.

Back in the room, Draco rubbed his arms, thankful the bed had finally fit into its special space in the wall, relieving his arms.

…

When they walked down the stairs five minutes later, Ron was waking up and everyone else was smirking at them.

"What?" Harry asked.

Draco rolled his eyes. "Remember what we talked about before, Potter?"

Harry turned to him, expression suspicious. "Yeah…"

"And you know the conversation we just had?"

"Mhmm…"

"Obviously what happened before just happened now."

"Uh hu – WHAT? They can't possibly think that…they…you…" he turned to them and then back to Draco helplessly, making incomprehensible gestures with his arms, trying but failing to voice his concerns.

His friends continued smirking and Draco sighed and went to get himself some nice, strong caffeine.

…

There's still one more coming! I decided to make this a trilogy. I'm also in a weird mood, as those of you familiar with my writing might have noticed. Never before have I used so many exclamation marks in just one chapter. Of course I usually write depressing stuff, and that doesn't usually need as many as comedy does…so I guess it's explainable.

Don't have to review if you're like me: too lazy to.

I almost just used an exclamation mark. I ALMOST JUST USED AN EXCLAMATION MARK! I JUST DID IT AGAIN! OH GOD, OH GOD, PANIC ATTACK, PANICK ATTACK, BREATHE GODDAMNIT, BREATHE! MORE OF THEM! THEY'RE ATTACKING! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Yeah.

I'm done.


End file.
